I Ramble: 8 March 2021

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful.

If there is a good habit that I find difficult to cultivate, it is the habit of reading the Quran translation whenever I’m having my monthly cycle.

I think it is partly due to the discouragement that was frequently enforced by people when it comes to girls being anywhere near the Quran when they are on their period.

I wish they emphasise more on the need to continue reading the translation so that the habit of having the Quran as one’s companion can be easily cultivated.

I decided to start with reading the translation of the opening chapter. I have already sort of memorised the meaning of the chapter by heart but I must say, when I read it again just now, I still feel affected by the verses. There is nothing plainly profound about the chapter but the reiteration of God’s characteristics made me remember things that I have forgotten about Him.

Seriously, no matter how many times you have read the Quran and memorised it, there is always something new to discover or realise and apply in your daily life.

For example, if you have been following this blog for years now, you would have always read the opening line of most of my posts to the point that you would either automatically immediately voice it in your head or skip to the content straightaway.

But what if I tell you that it is the very first verse of the Quran?

That when you open up this book, having felt a little lost and in need of guidance, the very first thing it tells you is about the nature of your Creator, that He is full of compassion and mercy — what would you feel then?

I have been feeling listless and extremely exhausted that I feel really small in this really great big world, to the point where I feel very perfunctory. Like I was only ever meant to fulfil a role or to play a part in other people’s lives. Because of that, I got lost in the generated idea of my sense of self. So for myself, when I read the verse and the entire chapter again, I realise that where I am in life right now, came from His graciousness and mercy. If I had a career that pays at least $10k, maybe I would have treated my husband like a servant; “Listen to me, I make the money, here is the money, so you gotta do this and that for me.” We are far more short-sighted than we perceive ourselves to be so it is very easy for us to say things such as, “If there really is a compassionate god, there will be no hunger in the world”. I don’t know about you guys and I can only speak for myself: The way I see it, for example, if we were to talk within the context of world hunger, God has graced those people with the ability to stay satiated the opportunity to absolve themselves of their sins by feeding the hungry. So to me, His graciousness runs deeper than what our shallow minds can comprehend of what compassion means.

But that’s just me and I am weird. So.

And Allah is Ar-Rahman, The Beneficent/The Most Gracious/The Most Compassionate. – MM

Advertisement

Working Alone; I Ramble: 2 March 2021

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful.

I am marching into March with a little madness, some patience, and a lot of worry.

It felt so much better being able to get things off my chest. Things I kept locked up in a chest.

I think that’s enough puns for today.

Working alone today. I used to hate it when I first started out but now, I have begun to enjoy it. There is a little bit of liberty that comes with going solo. It’s not unlike playing games. Sometimes you want to explore more without being rushed into completing missions by the group, which you achieve better by playing solo. Sometimes you need to play co-op to make it easier to take down the boss.

I am on fire today.

Anyway, here’s to a good day at work.

And Allah knows best. – MM

I Challenge: Boho Berry Challenge – December: Year-End Review (28 December 2018)

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

Wowsies. I actually did a challenge and completed it! Yay! It is the Boho Berry December Challenge!

Just click on the picture to know what it is all about. I’ve linked it to Boho Berry’s site regarding the challenge itself. I’m psyched to share my answers to the challenge right here.

Firstly, of course, I would like to thank my husband, Beedin, for supplying me with the notebook in which I did the journalling challenge.

It is just a small pocket notebook with blank pages in them, which proved useful in letting me doodle here and there. Thanks, Bee!

Secondly, I copied the list of topics in the challenge so I didn’t have to refer to my phone each time.

Yeah, I had a little fun handlettering the title but as you can see, I clearly lack spatial awareness. Just crammed the entire title up there on the page.

Next, I proceeded to do sort of a cover for the challenge. Was inspired by Amanda Rachel Lee’s December 2018 Bullet Journal set-up. Have a look at the following video.

Now have a look at my doodle. Bwahahahaha! So far away from her creation.

Then I went ahead with contributing to all of the topics.

1. Introductions

2. 2018 in Three Words

3. Favourite Memory

4. Biggest Accomplishment

5. Biggest Challenge

6. This Year, I…

7. Time Well Spent

8. Successes

9. Could Have Gone Better

10. Money Well Spent

11. Progress Towards Goals

Not going to share a sharp image of the above as I feel those goals are quite personal. But you can see them anyway if you put in the effort. HAHAHAHAHA!

12. New Skills Learnt

13. Breakthrough Moment

14. Smart Decisions

15. Good Habits Formed

16. Bad Habits Broken

17. Unfinished Business

18. Theme/Word for 2019

19. Start Doing

20. Keep Doing

21. Stop Doing

22. Out of My Comfort Zone

At this point of sharing, I believe I became less retrospective and more prospective instead. I think this topic should cover an event in 2018 where I got myself out of my comfort zone. Instead, I recorded what I would like to do in 2019 that would take me out of my comfort zone. But for the record, yeah, going on The Mummy ride for the second time sure was a step out of my comfort zone. All done for love’s sake! Hahahaha!

23. Setting Intentions

24. Something New

25. Self-care

I’ll just continue the sentence here: to…remain soft and smooth all year round.

26. Contribution, 27. Education & 28. Career

Once again, these turned out to be less retrospective than they were supposed to, I feel.

29. 2019 Will Feel Successful If…

30. Top Three 2019 Goals

31. Lessons Learned

There we go! Finally Huda has successfully completed a challenge! Yippy!

I must say that doing this exercise really helped me to have better ideas on how I’d like to plan out my 2019 Bullet Journal. I was really forced to sit and think through some of the topics. You can try it and you will also find that it can be tedious in certain aspects, especially when you are forced to think quite hard on life questions that you would sometimes prefer to leave unanswered. Muahahaha!

I hope everyone reading this would feel drawn to journalling and picking up similar challenges and more importantly, complete them. It would really organise your thoughts better and help you see your life from a different angle and reassess it.

Fun fact: It took me 40 minutes or so to do up this post, mostly in snapping the photos of the entries and positioning them under each heading. I wanted to start on my 2019 Bullet Journal but I’m starting to feel burnt out from just doing this post.

Yes, I have been feeling burnt out from doing little tasks recently. I think my depression is worsening but the reality is, I can never get it checked.

Because no one would believe me? Not sure. But I think it has been so overly glamourised that I much rather not deal with it.

Simple things have become so difficult to do. I take a longer time to do things that can be done in a minute or even a heartbeat.

And I feel so downright tired all the time.

Or maybe it’s just my diarrhea.

Welp.

And Allah is Ar-Razzaq, the Total Provider. – MM

I Ramble: 27 December 2018

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

Meowsies.

Where do I even begin.

About ushering in 2019? Summarise 2018 and wrap up the year? About games and gaming? About being ill? About my husband? About life? About journalling? Ai yai yai yai yai. So many things yet so little energy for anything.

Maybe we’ll start with the following photo.

This is me taking a shot of my television, showing a gameplay of The Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End on PS3 by my husband.

Yup, it’s close to eleven PM when we were playing a bit of POTC. I firstly want to express that I enjoy being married to someone who not only shares my hobbies but also engage in them. Best part is that neither of us were overly particular about how each other play. I must admit that I wanted him to save his gameplay on a separate file but then my better judgment got me to realise that hey, I can always replay the level if I ever feel like immersing myself fully in the game or being a completionist through collecting every single item and unlocking every chest and so on. There isn’t any pressing need for me to not share the gameplay anyway. But yes, if I was working on unlocking achievement seriously, I wouldn’t let him have the controller. Hahahaha!

The game was a fortuituos buy. Remember, I wanted to buy the first installment of Uncharted? Well, my husband and I stumbled upon a copy at Games Resort @ Compass One. It costs $30. My husband was telling me to just get it as PS3 games have noticeably dwindled in the shops. But when you’re the sole breadwinner of the family, you will obviously get sensitive about the price. $30, albeit half the price of what PS3 games usually cost, is still a pinch to me. So I decided not to get it from Compass One. Then, just yesterday, I jio-ed mum to go to Tampines Mall to look for a bullet journal. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find the journal I wanted to get but then I remembered there were two game shops at one of the levels. The first shop that I went to didn’t carry Uncharted so I decided to try the adjacent shop, GameXtreme. I found a copy and it costs $25. So I thought I might as well get it because I don’t know when my next trip to Tampines will be and that I probably couldn’t get a better deal anyway. Lo and behold! Just as I wanted to make payment, the dude noticed a sticker on the case and said, “This one three for $10. Go and get two more with a sticker.”

Gnarly! What a deal! So I grabbed POTC and Assasin’s Creed: Brotherhood because nothing else interest me. For POTC, I played it on Wii before and I really enjoyed it so I thought I’d play it again on PS3 instead. Then I simply chose AC because my husband likes the franchise. Wow. It’s so different when you’re a single gamer and when you’re a married gamer, huh? Hahahaha!

So yup! Lucky me bought Uncharted for just 1/3 of $10 instead of $30. That’s like…errr…my fractions is not good. 1/3 of 1/3? Cos you know, it is like three times less of three times less? Oh, bollocks, nevermind me. Point is, it pays to be frugal. And nice. Cos nasty customers won’t get good recommendations. Muahahahaha!

So that’s about yesterday and games and gaming. It’s been a while since I’ve touched my console so I feel the vertigo pretty damn badly this time. My head just fucking hurts all the time now. Sheesh.

Oh, yeah, I mentioned about wanting to get a bullet journal. I know, I can just use any old notebook but I really wanted to emulate the creator of the bullet journal and I think that the dots would be pretty helpful in making markings and estimating the amount of space I need for certain sections of the bullet journal.

So there goes the dream. I know I can just get it online but like I said, I have to be frugal as I am the only person who is holding the money.

But yeah back to gaming, I haven’t started on Uncharted yet ironically enough. Hahahaha! That shows just how much I enjoyed playing POTC on Wii. To be honest, I can’t recall going through the same sort of experience on the PS like I did on the Wii! Let me just check for a moment if my instincts are true. Both versions really feel a whole lot different to me! Or is it I’m demented? Let me just check for a sec.

Oh yes, they are indeed different! Oh, my God! I recall smashing crates a lot more in POTC Wii and spending more time in the sea prison in the beginning chapter. POTC PS3 is like a super condensed version of the movie and I didn’t spend as much time in the beginning chapter.

Oh, wow, wow, wow! Nonetheless, this PS3 version that is new to me, is still enjoyable. It does have that Uncharted feel in terms of having to figure your way out and scaling walls and shimmey-ing ledges. So I figured that POTC is a great warm-up game to gear me up for POTC.

I found out about the versions being different from GameSpot. Man, it has been a while since I’ve been there and blog there. Now, I miss blogging there about games and all that jazz. Really takes me back given just how much I have rambled on about games in this post! Felt like the good old times!

For a proper game post, I should write about the differences I experienced in both versions and whether I enjoy one more than the other. Apparently the Wii version is the same as the PSP and PS2 versions but the PS3 and XBox360 versions are different, with the XBox360’s varying slightly from the PS3’s.

Wow, amazing! We all discovered something new!

Anyway, I feel like I rambled on long enough. Will definitely want to complete the games I started playing on both the PC and on the PS3. Also, will definitely want to get back to bullet journalling and be more life-organised.

I really like to make up my own words sometimes. Just how do you guys live with me? Hahahaha!

And Allah is Al-Wahhab, the Supreme Bestower. – MM

I Ramble: 21 September 2018

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

I just realised that I have been sick for a week today. That’s bad and I’m nowhere near recovery. My appetite has gotten worse and off days just feel like overslept days. I don’t feel like I get to enjoy my off days. 😦

I tried to relax my mind but all my mind could do was to think, “Oh, shucks, I have to work tomorrow”. That’s the sucky thing about my workplace. They don’t let you take MC. Then how the heck are you supposed to recover, right? Hais. Sometimes, I just want to give up but I am telling myself to gather my last bits of determination to give the place another chance. Probably a last chance. I’m giving myself until February 2019 and if it feels like crap, the best thing to do is to just leave. But for now, I have to overcome all these feelings of the place and the job being difficult. I actually told myself that I should stay for five years, just like my preschool job but after working here for a year, I definitely congratulated myself for being able to stay that long. Honestly, a lot of people just give up and the best part is, they’re mostly part-timers. So well, you know, that just emphasises how bad things must be for full-timers!

I know my command of the English Language is in ruins right now but that just means I should keep blogging amd vlogging, right? Practise to perfection.

Not like anybody can be absolutely perfect because only Allah is perfect.

Speaking of Allah, I feel like I have neglected him a lot and forgotten him a lot and it’s just so hard to get back to my good Muslimah ways again. Oh, the temptations of this world!

The fact that I’m still sitting on the couch and blogging instead of praying my Maghrib, shows my deliquency.

Okay, I will have to rush this now.

I’ve been itching to vlog but I have absolutely no inspiration to vlog. The easiest is to probably vlog about my wedding and honeymoon but I’m not gonna be so mainstream like that for now. I just want to get back to the usual vlogging before making any special vlogs I suppose. In retrospect, I don’t think I can even share my honeymoon media. They’re much too private. HAHAHAHA! So, the wedding it is but not anytime soon.

So what’s the story, morning glory?

And Allah is Al-Quddus, the Most Holy. – MM

I Ramble: 19 September 2018

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

Meowsies! I’m back again! Work has been bad for my body that I’ve been rather ill. I’m still not well and I feel worse now. Huhu. Anyway, le husband has been great to me. I woke up today to find that he had washed my clothes and loaded them in the dryer, knowing that I will be needing my work clothes for tomorrow.

And now he’s cooking for us! T_T

I don’t know how my life would be wouldn’t this amazing human being right here. Sighs.

Okay, on other news…hm…what else is there to talk about?

It’s pouring here in Buangkok so I guess it’s basically indoor time today with le husband. We’ve had a few rounds of PUBG and I’ve smuled with much hilarity and maybe later we’ll be guitaring together…because I finally brought another acoustic guitar from my Tampines home to my Buangkok home. Yippy! It’s been really cool and fun and chill to just sit with le husband and play random stuff. I would be practising my chords and he would be playing arpeggios or riffs.

So yup, hopefully those who are affected by the weather will have a good day in today.

Here’s something for the eyes to see. Random vid lol.

And Allah is Al-Malik, the King.