Early Days of Ramadan; I Ramble: 7 April 2022

In the name of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.

Hello!!! Hahaha! Feeling a little perky today but that is mostly because I managed to have a little bit more sleep compared to the past few days.

*yawns*

Well, I did say, “A little”. Ha!

My first few days of Ramadan have been shaky and it was quite challenging to work while feeling hungry and nauseous. I have motion sickness so it kinda sucks when I cannot pop a piece of candy into my mouth to quell the dizziness while we are on the road.

Also, I have been having tummy troubles. I kept using the toilet right after pre-dawn meals so that left me running on an empty stomach from early morning to sunset. Sad.

I realised I cannot look at my phone for too long while we are on the road because of my motion sickness. I cannot stand for more than five minutes either. I felt like I wanted to faint while waiting for one of the customers to return our delivery trolley so I had to sit in the vehicle while waiting.

My husband is expecting a house guest in late April so that means, I have to start cleaning the house already. OMG. The whole point of me quitting my day job is so I could have a well-maintained house. However, I have been so focused on helping my husband out with deliveries that I have completely lost sight of the maintenance of the house.

I am really glad I started bullet journalling again. It has been helping me keep track of a lot of things.

So yeah, I will start my cleaning mission tonight. I think I want to start with the smallest space in my house, which is the store room. Anyway, we need to look for the death certificate of my husband’s dad to facilitate the remarriage application of his youngest sister. Might as well start there. It has cluttered up again after our massive decluttering last year, I think.

I also need to remember to post on my Instagram daily. I had completely forgotten to do that when I had promised I would! Gah!

I need to work out some selling details of our merchandise for Street MOB Clothing. I need to reply to a vendor I am enquiring with and then break down the costs to see what works best for us.

As for Smiling Greens, I think I am happier now with the main landing page but I will need to do up the other pages and start doing up regular content. A lot of work cut out for me.

And Allah is Al-Muzil, The Dishonourer of Disbelievers. – MM

Advertisement

Hello, Ramadan; I Ramble: 2 April 2022

In the name of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.

Aaaand just like that it is Ramadan again! Woohoo!

I must say I have not started out very well but managed to pull myself back together to have a more decent go at this year’s Ramadan.

I decided not to do a Ramadan vlog series like I have done previously. Instead, I will just be posting daily on my Instagram feed. I have already started with a Hello Ramadan kinda post.

I think it will be good for me to get back to my prayer tree tracker. I want to see whether the change in my job/lifestyle has produced better results for me.

The red leaves are daily prayers, orange for terawih, and yellow for witr. I have until tomorrow’s Asar prayers to add on more red leaves for 1 Ramadan.

Yes, I know, my Ramadan efforts are pathetic. More power to you if you are able to establish eight terawih raka’ats and three witr raka’ats at least daily! My Ramadan starts are always weak admittedly. My next Ramadan goal is to start strong at eight raka’ats for terawih. But for this Ramadan, my intention is to slowly build up my stamina. I could not even pray five times a day religiously, what more carry out the sunnah prayers before/after the mandatory daily prayers. Naturally, I am spiritually weak and my heart is pretty dead. Ergo, I do not share the same drive as other Muslims in welcoming Ramadan.

But of course, I do not want to let my heart remain dead and my spirit weak forever. I have to start somewhere. So I figured, possible public humiliation and bewilderment through this post might give me the nudge I need to make myself a better Muslim.

I definitely want to do better in life and the Afterlife. In order to do that, I need to hold myself accountable.

Ya Rabb, please give me the strength to be a better person and Muslimah. Amin.

And Allah is Al-Mu’izz, The Honourer, The Bestower. – MM

Hello, April; I Ramble: 1 April 2022

In the name of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.

What’s up, guys?!

Today is prominently April Fool’s Day but luckily the Singapore government was not fooling us; the Singapore-Malaysia border has opened after two years of closure!

It is a cause for celebration for those who have been yearning for quick getaways.

As for myself, I have no plans to cross the border yet. Right now, my attention is on adjusting to my new lifestyle and my brand and businesses.

Working side-by-side with my husband in doing deliveries has been a roller coaster. Not every couple can stand spending every moment with each other. Fortunately, my husband and I have a few different interests that give us some breathing space when we need to. Most importantly, we love each other enough to withstand each other’s nonsense.

I have never been yelled at as much as I have been yelled at and I have never laughed as much as I have been laughing now.

In the end, I think, if you want to survive as a couple, you gotta take the hits from your partner without immediately reacting negatively. Hits here do not refer to physical altercations, of course. Hits here refer to the emotional missiles, verbal angry outbursts, snide remarks, etcetera. Then, when there is an opportunity to respond kindly to the hits, take the chance to express your unhappiness. At least, this is how I make my marriage work. For example, during our delivery, when I told my husband that we need to go towards a certain direction yet he chose to go a different route and caused us to be late, I held in my “I told you so” beration first. After completing half of our deliveries, when he got in a better mood and I judged that he would be able to accept criticism, then I let out my “See, never listen to me, right? I told you to go through my way, right? We could have reached here earlier. But you shout shout shout at me and made me sad.” Of course, I would pout a bit in order to express the unhappiness while doing away any intention of being mean. It helps a lot, man. He would always apologise and console me thereafter. A lot of people tend to pay more attention to good timing during the courtship period. By right, your sense of good timing should also last throughout the entirety of your partnership post-courtship. So please practise good timing and patience whenever your partner makes you upset. There really is no point in adding fuel to the fire. Even if you know you can win the argument, choose to lose first in order to win later on. So that when you cannot win the argument, you will still win your partner’s heart.

Now that I am mostly working on weekdays with my husband, I have more free time to work on Street MOB Clothing (SMC) and Smiling Greens.

Finally, we have taken a baby step forward with SMC. Managed to reserve the business name under Accounting and Corporate Regulatory Authority, a Singapore statutory board. So now we have <120 days to complete the business registration, which is a fair amount of time to make the money for the registration fee. Its founder who is our good friend, Danial, entrusted me with the ownership of the business.

It took me a while before I realised how I have uncannily taken ownership of assets. I am a part-owner of my parents’ house, I am an owner of a car only my husband knows how to drive, and now I am a business owner. This is just crazy. I would have been more impressed with myself if I did not have to owe any money in owning all three. Alas, now my husband and I are living a “kais pagi makan pagi, kais petang makan petang” (make ends meet) lifestyle.

It is very challenging, of course. I am giving it three months. If it does not work out, I will need to get back to working on a permanent basis. It does not have to be full-time. Maybe part-time will do.

However, right now, we are happy to help Wild Boocha with their deliveries. Thanks to our good friend, Shike, for sharing with us a platform where ad-hoc delivery requests are posted and thanks to Danial for advertising on there and highly recommending us to his bosses for the job when we responded to his ad. Last week, when we started delivering for them, we only had a few orders each day. This week, we ended up with more each day! And we are so ever grateful to the Lord for his Providence and to Wild Boocha for entrusting us with their deliveries!

As for Smiling Greens, I will need to overhaul the concept a little bit. Since we are not able to operate as a microgreens provider, Shike and I agreed to scale it down to a blog. Once it is ready, I will shamelessly promote it here and I hope you can support it by reading the articles we post on it. Hehe.

Yeah, I remain hopeful that things will fall into place with good tidings and blessings from the Almighty.

April is going to be an amazing month with all the restarts and of course, RAMADAN IS COMING!!!

Let us be excited together!

It is going to be a challenging but fun month!

And Allah is Ar-Raafi’, The Exalter. – MM

Positively Failing At Everything; I Ramble: 15 March 2022

In the name of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.

My friend, Shike, has been checking on how I have been doing since my last day of working at the old workplace.

So I thought I will just put it out in the open.

I am failing.

I am positively failing.

I am positively failing at everything.

I am failing as a wife, I am failing as a delivery coordinator, and I am failing myself.

Heck, I even discovered that my old schoolmate has turned out to be a successful public prosecutor.

So yes, I am an absolute failure.

But weirdly, I do not feel upset by my failures. I am kind of excited.

Have I finally turned old? *gasps*

I mean, by right, at any given point of time, Nurul Huda would have just snapped and broken down or whatever shit she would usually do when her self-esteem gets beaten up.

But somehow, this Nurul Huda is responding so differently upon acknowledging her failures in life.

I do not know what gives. Maybe all the walking I have been doing has somehow cleared my head and allowed me to think a little more compared to feeling. Feeling is how I get carried away most times. Overthinking does my head in too. Yet, at this point in my life, maybe finally I have somewhat resonated with the Islamic principle of accepting the fact that what is written for me is not meant for others and vice versa. I cannot always want to have what is written for others because what is written for me may actually be better for me. I think this abstract concept is very hard for a lot of people to grasp because people are so used to more tangible experiences. And that is why it is very hard for people to grasp the concept of equity, which consequently caused them not to understand Islam. The idea of equality is easier for them to grasp because the concept can be demonstrated more tangibly. Like when a woman gets an orange, a man should get one too to be equal. So when the woman gets an orange but the man gets two instead, it no longer becomes equal. However, what if the woman gets an orange because she lives alone and the man gets two oranges because he has to share the oranges with his wife? The distribution of the oranges is definitely not equal but it is definitely equitable because in the end each person gets one whole orange to himself or herself. So how could it make sense then that the single woman gets one orange and the man with a wife gets one orange too?

So while my old schoolmate is probably saving many individuals’ lives through her profession, which looks a lot like saving the world, I am actually probably saving some individuals’ lives as well without realising and to these individuals, I may actually mean the world to them. In the end, it works out equitably. I wish people who constantly punish themselves for not doing more or feel bitter or resentful towards the success of others can understand this concept, really. People need to be whole lot more positive about their failures in order to learn and grow.

Yeah, it sucks to fail a lot in life and I mulled over this on a public park bench for a good amount of time during one of my recent walks. But my failures shaped me into what I am now. I feel like this Nurul Huda, this version of myself, is exactly what is needed at the present moment in the course of what has been written.

While I have failed to meet some of the targets I set for myself this week, I am happy to say that I have been learning how to monetise blogging. I did not realise just how much there was to cover until I start to get headaches from trying to absorb all of these information.

And yeah, I will definitely try again to wake up at 5am so I can spend more time studying. The faster I study, the faster I can spring into action, and the more time I can carve out for Street MOB Clothing and Smiling Greens.

And Allah is Al-Fattah, The Supreme Solver. – MM

Tired But Happy; I Ramble: 28 September 2021

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful.

There is a bug going around at the workplace. One by one, my men are dropping like flies, tossing in an MC for a day or two. I am attributing it to the weather; it has been rainy lately. I think we may be lined up for a wet October at this rate. I am also attributing it to slight paranoia perhaps. The number of new COVID-19 cases here in Singapore is predicted to be as high as 5000 daily. I do not know about you guys but I sure do not appreciate the way our minister commented on it. How I interpreted it was that this is the norm and we all gotta live with it.

I did not vote for this bunch. You guys did so live with it.

I digressed. But yeah, it may have been a psychological thing, you know, you believe you are sick because you keep hearing about how the people around you are falling ill.

But mostly, I believe, we are all falling sick because we are trying to do two to four people’s job at one single time. I know this for a fact because I am going through it at the workplace. That is why I have been grumpy but I really do not want to be so because I want to remain kind to all the poor souls who have to power through at work like me.

I have been having like the runs and I came home from work with a terribly sore throat yesterday and I was coughing so badly. Today, my head was super heavy. Probably from the stuffed nose and the irritated throat. I even felt a bit feverish.

But I forced myself to go out for a run today. I intended to run 1.6km in 13 minutes. But I ended up running 1.8km in 17 minutes instead. Yeah, I was slower. I was afraid of slipping while running on the wet ground. The rain poured when I wanted to head out at 4pm. I only managed to get out at 6.30pm after it has ceased for a while.

I am feeling better now although I know my body is tired. I was very sickly when I was a kid. I would have a fever and it never went away. One day, my family and I had to chase after the bus. I ran and after that, I felt a whole lot better. The fever went away immediately. Even my mum was surprised. So I figured, running is actually a good cure for my body. Please do not copy me! All of our bodies are different. Mine is just weird like that. I do not consume a lot of pills. I hate medicine. So maybe running just forces my body to go through some huge ventilation, you know, like opening all the windows of your house wide enough for the stale air to exit and fresh air to enter. I think that is how my body works. Any other person, maybe, if they run while they are sick, they will get sicker or just pass out. So please pay attention to your body and know it well.

My only problem in life is not drinking enough plain water.

I am listening to the work and jazz piano live radio I linked in the previous post while typing this post. The tunes are better this time compared to when I was doing the previous one. Lucky me. Hence a nice little post here.

I have my work cut out for me. I am not complaining. I am happy. But a girl can only shoulder so much difficulty. So I need to siphon out some parts of me that feel overhwlemed and because I do not really talk to people much, I do that by writing here. I have a huge work ego. I do not like admitting that I am struggling. I think that is why it is hard for me to ask for help. I keep believing that I can accomplish all the tasks but sometimes, it is just not humanly possible. Or sometimes, it is just not how God planned it for me.

I am definitely going through a vigorous work week now, both full-time and part-time.

I am going to keep on working hard and keep on taking care of my body.

And of course, stay insanely happy. 🙂

And Allah is Ar-Rahmaan, The Most Merciful. – MM

If It Has To Hurt, Then Let It Hurt; I Ramble: 5 March 2021

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful.

For the brave, nothing is too difficult.” – Arsene Wenger

I have decided to pull the knife out of my heart after walking around with a stabbed heart for close to a week now.

It’s still going to hurt a lot, walking around with an open wound.

But hey, at least it’s less heavy. It’s a start.

I am simply looking forward to the day I get to be a permanent resident in Heaven.

That is the end game.

And Allah knows best. – MM

I Challenge: Boho Berry Challenge – December: Year-End Review (28 December 2018)

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

Wowsies. I actually did a challenge and completed it! Yay! It is the Boho Berry December Challenge!

Just click on the picture to know what it is all about. I’ve linked it to Boho Berry’s site regarding the challenge itself. I’m psyched to share my answers to the challenge right here.

Firstly, of course, I would like to thank my husband, Beedin, for supplying me with the notebook in which I did the journalling challenge.

It is just a small pocket notebook with blank pages in them, which proved useful in letting me doodle here and there. Thanks, Bee!

Secondly, I copied the list of topics in the challenge so I didn’t have to refer to my phone each time.

Yeah, I had a little fun handlettering the title but as you can see, I clearly lack spatial awareness. Just crammed the entire title up there on the page.

Next, I proceeded to do sort of a cover for the challenge. Was inspired by Amanda Rachel Lee’s December 2018 Bullet Journal set-up. Have a look at the following video.

Now have a look at my doodle. Bwahahahaha! So far away from her creation.

Then I went ahead with contributing to all of the topics.

1. Introductions

2. 2018 in Three Words

3. Favourite Memory

4. Biggest Accomplishment

5. Biggest Challenge

6. This Year, I…

7. Time Well Spent

8. Successes

9. Could Have Gone Better

10. Money Well Spent

11. Progress Towards Goals

Not going to share a sharp image of the above as I feel those goals are quite personal. But you can see them anyway if you put in the effort. HAHAHAHAHA!

12. New Skills Learnt

13. Breakthrough Moment

14. Smart Decisions

15. Good Habits Formed

16. Bad Habits Broken

17. Unfinished Business

18. Theme/Word for 2019

19. Start Doing

20. Keep Doing

21. Stop Doing

22. Out of My Comfort Zone

At this point of sharing, I believe I became less retrospective and more prospective instead. I think this topic should cover an event in 2018 where I got myself out of my comfort zone. Instead, I recorded what I would like to do in 2019 that would take me out of my comfort zone. But for the record, yeah, going on The Mummy ride for the second time sure was a step out of my comfort zone. All done for love’s sake! Hahahaha!

23. Setting Intentions

24. Something New

25. Self-care

I’ll just continue the sentence here: to…remain soft and smooth all year round.

26. Contribution, 27. Education & 28. Career

Once again, these turned out to be less retrospective than they were supposed to, I feel.

29. 2019 Will Feel Successful If…

30. Top Three 2019 Goals

31. Lessons Learned

There we go! Finally Huda has successfully completed a challenge! Yippy!

I must say that doing this exercise really helped me to have better ideas on how I’d like to plan out my 2019 Bullet Journal. I was really forced to sit and think through some of the topics. You can try it and you will also find that it can be tedious in certain aspects, especially when you are forced to think quite hard on life questions that you would sometimes prefer to leave unanswered. Muahahaha!

I hope everyone reading this would feel drawn to journalling and picking up similar challenges and more importantly, complete them. It would really organise your thoughts better and help you see your life from a different angle and reassess it.

Fun fact: It took me 40 minutes or so to do up this post, mostly in snapping the photos of the entries and positioning them under each heading. I wanted to start on my 2019 Bullet Journal but I’m starting to feel burnt out from just doing this post.

Yes, I have been feeling burnt out from doing little tasks recently. I think my depression is worsening but the reality is, I can never get it checked.

Because no one would believe me? Not sure. But I think it has been so overly glamourised that I much rather not deal with it.

Simple things have become so difficult to do. I take a longer time to do things that can be done in a minute or even a heartbeat.

And I feel so downright tired all the time.

Or maybe it’s just my diarrhea.

Welp.

And Allah is Ar-Razzaq, the Total Provider. – MM