I Romance: 25 May 2017

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

Dear my love,

I have just finished the last piece of paperwork that I ‘owe’ the centre. I feel very overwhelmed right now because I know the past week has been difficult for the both of us…and it may be until we have both reached our goals for the upcoming month.

Sayang, it’s really crazy how fast Allah is rewarding me for every difficulty I went through. Right after pulling myself together to overcome my final moments at the workplace, He rewarded me with our booking at Lagun Sari. I was looking at FaceBook and they have just announced that they were having a promotion — secure wedding date with just $100 — which we managed to do before the promotion was announced! Then there was me finishing the article for the company newsletter although it was dropped to my lap one week before I left the workplace, which we all found unfair. Nonetheless, I finished it last Tuesday, way after I have resigned, and within three hours. Right upon completing, my dad passed me the cheque from the company. Timely reward, wasn’t it? Lastly, after finally finishing the centre’s resource inventory list, which took two consecutive Saturdays in my final month of working and a whole chunk of my time after my resignation (days actually), I was getting ready for bed when I saw my cash collections…of overseas currency. More precisely, I saw Pilipinas Piso. My jaw dropped. I took down the glass bottles containing the overseas money and lo, in total, I had PHP511.25. It is good for two meals. Alhamdulillah! What a blessing duing these difficult times! In fact I even found a 50 000 Korean won note. If I change that I could get at least SGD45. I was so tempted to take it! But… I felt that it is best to leave it there until I need it. Maybe one day, I will be grateful to have kept it for a future trip to Korea again. Wallahualam bisawab. Only Allah knows best. I’m just very thankful to Allah for all the good things. I’ll take responsibility for the bad things.

I hope that we can both continue to seek help from Allah through patience and prayer. He always answers, just in ways we cannot imagine or in the time He decides when is best for us.

I’m going to miss you terribly, my darling. If you ever feel lonely, you can always text King. 🙂

Yours forever,

Bae ❤


I Ramble: 5 May 2017

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

So I spent yesterday at home instead of attending my sister’s graduation as planned because I still wasn’t feeling too well. Plus, the fact that the doctor gave me an MC for yesterday as well just shows that it ain’t fly for me to spread my ‘blessings’ with the world. Hehehe.

So what I did yesterday was to clean my room. Damn, it feels good to finally be able to see the floor of my room. I threw out a lot of things too. I can’t possibly hold onto every single thing. I can’t take anything with me to the grave eventually. Now I’m left with is the dusting of shelves and sorting and organising. That would take a lot of time so I’m hoping to do something about it on Sunday. I’ll be spending today working on my Malay children’s portfolios. Tomorrow, I will be packing up and listing whatever it is I need to do for the Malay resources at work. I’m getting le fiance to swing by to speed up the process and then we’ll zhao for paktor from there.

As I was trying to get back some control in my life, I realise that if there is something that I’m blessed with that doesn’t get messy, it would be my relationship with le fiance. It’s a healthy relationship and a very loving one. I never felt like I have to try so hard to make it work. In fact, I feel like I should try harder in loving him back! Hahaha!

My man has roped me into playing Cabal Online with him and it has been amazing and fun!

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He is always reassuring me and always coming to my rescue without me telling him or asking help from him.

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He even brought me to a dungeon with him although I pretty much suck at dungeon mechanics. The way he played with me and guided me through it is very kind, just like the way Nora does it. I really gotta give it to Nora for roping me into cool games and roping me into MMORPG. As for my man, he pulls me in deeper into the mechanics of a game. He loves programming more than gaming so it was really refreshing for me to see a different perspective of games and computer technology in general. In fact, his passion inspired me and I have been reading up on computer science such as this:

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It’s a very good read. I would recommend it for anyone who wishes to know some historical backgrounds on the pioneers of computer science and how a mathematical problem transpires the technology we have today. Call me dumb but I finally get what SQL and Boolean strings are from reading this book although they were mentioned briefly. I must admit I don’t understand the entire book 100% but for an average reader like me, I really got some general insights from it. If ever, this makes a good introductory read to computer science.

That aside, I received my first wedding gift! Hehehe. I’m not married yet but since I’m leaving the workplace soon, my ever reliable colleague decided to get the gifting out of the way. Hehehe. She’s older than me and gets amused by my antics and she is one of the people who knows how my friendship with A turns into a relationship and finally engagement. She really bought me a classy gift, which I felt is much needed for my soon-to-be-new home.

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She’s only a part-timer yet I feel the love so much. I guess that’s what happens when you touch people’s lives enough for them to show some care towards you. I must admit, I enjoy the positive human emotional aspects in a workplace.

With that said, well, here’s to moving forward.

And Allah is Al-Malik, the King. – MM

I Ramble: 15 March 2017

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

How do you fix your relationship with God? :/

Sometimes it feels like I don’t thank and remember Him enough.

How do you maintain your relationship with your fiance?

Sometimes it feels like I don’t tell and show him I love him enough. No, I’m not coming from a bad space. Just that I feel so, so blessed to have this man in my life. He truly loves me and cares for me and shows me that very well. But I? Hahaha! My name on his phone is Baeda Sayang but his name on my phone is still Amirudin. Get the picture? Hehe.

But then again, he knows that I have an unhealthy obsession with people’s names. I like to ensure that I know their full names and that I recognise them by their first names. Instead of putting ‘Mom’ and ‘Dad’ and ‘brother’ and ‘sister’ on my phone, I have them listed by their first names instead. And yeah, I know he is not affected by such petty things unlike other guys because he is weird like that. And I’m weird. So. 😀

One of these days I’m going to sneak in an emoji beside my name on his phone. Hehehe.

Do you know why I’m suddenly having all these thoughts?

He told me I remind him of Belldandy from Oh My Goddess! or Ah! My Goddess! and I feel like, eh, sure or not? So many people will be choking on their drinks when they hear that! Hehehe.

I personally feel like I’m a far cry from Belldandy but then by now, we both know that we see in each other what the other does not see in himself/herself.

And Allah is As-Sami, the Hearer of All. – MM