In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful.

What I really like about the first chapter of the Quran is that it makes an earnest prayer.

And I think my effort of simply reading the translation of it had somehow turned into a prayer. This is why we should think good thoughts and make good speech. You never know when your thoughts, expressed or kept to yourself, can turn into a prayer.

So I was in a bit of a bind and was not able to express myself and my situation to my husband, A. Somehow, yesterday morning, it all came out of me without me arranging my words or planning when to say what I need to say. I couldn’t even stop myself. It was like I was performing a script made for me. On any other days, A’s reaction would have been highly likely negative. For some reason, his reaction that morning was super positive. He held me in his arms and said, “I’m very proud of you.”

Bewildered, I had to ask him to affirm that he wasn’t mad at me. He reassured me that he wasn’t.

And that sort of grace continued into the night. On a typical day, he would be sitting far away from me minding his own business. However, last night, for some reason, he decided to sit beside me as I worked on an article for SG.

While doing so, I was chatting with the SG boss. At first, I angled my laptop towards me. But then I decided against it and angled it towards both A and I. He glanced at my chat and remarked on my conversation with le boss but I didn’t mind it. I actually like that. That openness I felt, being able to share everything in the open with A.

I really think that should be the way. I have learnt from it now, that maybe next time I should be the one to sit beside him as I do my work.

I have been reading my past blog entries from 2016. I must say, I am reminded of how much my husband loves me. I just wish he could make me feel it more in the present, instead of loving me too quietly.

And Allah is Knower of All Things. – MM