In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

I am working at 7.30am today but it is 1.54am right now and I am so wode awake. I am going to get in trouble at this sleepless rate!

I think I got too pumped for life and now I’m overly energised when I should be resting for work later.

Gyabon.

Anyway, since I am up but refusing to leave my bed, I am going to make lists. Ha!

Things I have to do:

1. SMC proposal to our supplier. Was supposed to get this done yesterday but I was simply too out of it. Yikes.

2. Khairi’s preloved stall coordination. Was suppose to have this sorted out yesterday as well with help from le fiance but he was too busy and I was too weak. Yikes.

3. SMC meeting minutes for previous meeting last last Saturday morning, 12/8. Definitely overdue. Yikes.

4. Memorise Heattech product knowledge for promotion at work. Was supposed to have memorised it by the first week of August! But now is the second last of August liao. Yikes.

5. Volunteer for 6-3-6 at work for promotion. Was supposed to have done this in the second week! Yikes.

6. Memorise Fast Retailing Group Mission for promotion at work. Was supposed to have done this last week too! Yikes.

7. Have F/W Coordination Knowledge for promotion at work. Haiyo, this one also supposed to be done by last week!

8. Stockroom Management and Stocktake…I have no idea what this is about but I need to get those done by this week so I will need to find out soon at work.

9. Review the things I need to achieve in order to get confirmation at work.

Who knew working for Uniqlo Orchard Central can be extremely demanding eh?

Now do you know why I am always so exhausted from working besides the physical nature of the job? Hahaha!

Good game.

Okay, now I feel sleepy already.

Okay, now I feel super hungry and sleepy.

Gyabon.

Some orders of business:

I know tht I would like to set aside my Fridays as SMC business days. Although I may not be able to attend meetings or run errands on all Fridays due to work, I’ll be putting in more effort into the business on that designated day, be it online promotion, recruitment, or designing? I think it is about time I try my hand at it. If I can’t use Photoshop, I can always sketch out my ideas and let either Danial or le fiance translate the idea into psd for printing. So no excuses there.

I would also like to dedicate my Sundays for my religion. Be it reading the Quran or Islamic books or watching lecture videos. It’s like going to church on Sundays, isn’t it? Hahaha! There’s also the Sunday madrasah concept to relate to, you know. Hahaha!

I would like to designate Mondays for Metropolitan Muslimah. Easy to remember. MMM.

Tuesdays would be for Dry Magnum, the cover band I’m singing for. The guys have been wanting to jam but due to the financial situation of le fiance and I, we have been putting it off but I think I should start practising already. They want to play new songs I do not know of too.

Wednesday is for my own band with le fiance, Rubber Bandits. We don’t the financial luxury but we still have our talent to put to good use. In fact, when I sang to le fiance the most recent song I wrote (I forgot the title already lol), he straightaway got the melody down with his electric guitar and shared the recording with me. So we both could definitely do something for our humble band.

Thursdays will be Reading Day until I have finished reading 28 books as challenged.

Saturdays will be lepak days. A girl needs her rest and not think or do anything. Even if she has to work, she will take it easy.

Sunday: Islamic Studies

Monday: Metropolitan Muslimah

Tuesday: Dry Magnum

Wednesday: Rubber Bandits

Thursday: Reading Day

Friday: SMC

Saturday: Super Santai Day (Santai in Malay means relax)

It’s 2.34am now. Shit. Hahahaha!

And Allah is Al-Muqit, the Nourisher. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

I checked out of life for a little bit. I don’t know if it was the grief over Chester, if it was my depression, which I have now understood to be one of my pre-menstrual symptoms unfortunately, or if it was my fatigue from working at Uniqlo Orchard Central for the past month.

It’s really hard to be a woman, especially when you don’t really have the control over your biological workings. I really want to be able to be hyped and pumped and energetic all the time but my body is not up to speed with my desires. I also require a lot of time to recover from any physical exertions or ailments. As if that is not bad enough, when I’m having my monthly cycle, it sets me back even more.

But after resting today on my off day, I’m feeling better and ready to check back into life.

And le fiance really played a huge part in understanding me wholly, knowing who and how I am as a person and those biological factors that can really mess me up a lot, which affected us a bit. His patience is really important and I’m glad that he loves me with all of his love and patience. I think the patience part is what has been missing in a lot of the guys I’ve come across. So Alhamdulillah for a lover like him. 🙂

I think hearing Chester’s voice will still hurt a little bit. Linkin Park was quite a huge part of my life after all. But I don’t expect anyone to understand this.

But, let’s get on with life now.

This is 10% luck
20% skill
15% concentrated power of will
5% pleasure
50% pain
And a 100% reason to remember the name

Meanwhile I just grip my mic
And hope me and my team make it through alright
Because say what you will, and say what you might
But don’t ignore who it’s for at the end of the night

And Allah is Al-Hafiz, the Preserver, the Protector. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Merciful, the All-Compassionate.

I finally have some sort of energy to blog…but I’m in the train on the way to work as I type this. Hahaha!

All thanks to la Mama for buying me new comfy shoes! Wheee! I don’t feel it as bad as I have for the past three weeks. Yay!

Remember my previous post when I shared about my listlessness? Well, turns out, right after writing that post, le fiance completed the order form for SMC. Then I felt bad so I decided to finalise it and yeah. Now you can order through the SMC website already. 🙂

Then after that, la Mama got me out of the house to buy my shoes. So I only managed to publish my post like 5 minutes before midnight that day. Hahaha!

An uneventful day became an eventful day after all. Props to my man for knowing how to make me do stuff without actually telling me to do so. Hahaha!

I seriously think he knows how to handle me best in whatever state I am in.

Before I sign off, I just want to share a bit of rap I wrote after coming across MOE’s recruitment ads. Lol. I can roll eyes many many times but I chose to rap instead hahahaha.

“Find your calling at MOE”

But sir, MOE don’t wanna call me

Cos sir, you made it plain as can be

I ain’t sh– without your local degree

How many times you gotta the salt the wound

Throw it right in my face, perpetuating old goons

But well, we all know it’s more bane than boon

Them devils, preying on us with their fork and spoon

And Allah is Ar-Rahman, the All-Compassionate. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

I wasted at least 12 hours of my day off sleeping. And now I’m wasting another 6 hours of my day stoning in front of the computer.

I’ve been yawning away as well.

I feel so lethargic.

I really have no idea how to manage my fatigue thus far.

Then how sia next year when I’m married?

When I have kids?

And my business how?

@_@

God help me.

And Allah is Al-Ali, the Extremely Exalted. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

Today, I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. Yesterday was the first day I experienced Shop Floor (SF) duties. Now I feel like crap already. Hahahaha! The good thing is that I’m starting late today at 12.30pm but I end at 11pm. The bad thing is that I’m starting early tomorrow at 8am. You see the very small time window I have before I start work in the morning? But the good news is that I end an hour earlier tomorrow, at 5.30pm instead of the usual 6.30pm. The day after tomorrow, I will be working from 12.30pm to 11pm again. But then the bad news is I’m working straight to the weekend, with my next off day falling on this Sunday.

Ah, my body. Help. T_T

And Allah is Ar-Rahman, the All-Compassionate. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

I must say that five out of the seven songs that the guy highlighted in the video below, are the ones that helped me through life. In fact, many Linkin Park songs have helped me out a lot.

I know, you’re probably sick of the whole Chester’s death thing but I guess it affects me quite a bit.

I suppose it’s because I, or even we, have always thought of the lyrics as words that were meant to relate to us or to connect to us…but I/we never realised that they were cries for help or even suicide notes to a certain extent.

What I really want to talk about in this post is about songwriting.

I miss it. A lot. It’s been a while since I’ve tried to write a song. As someone who aspires to be a songwriter, I feel like I have regressed so badly in my craft. G-Dragon from the famous K-Pop group Big Bang shared that he wrote a song every night before sleeping. That’s the ideal calibre for any songwriter really. It’s not about waiting to be inspired or waiting to have the mood to do so. It is a form of discipline. You cannot develop or progress without discipline in anything you do. I’m slowly picking up the habit of being more disciplined but I need to do better. For now, I have somewhat become a bit more consistent in blogging but there is still room for improvement. Even blogging is a skill which needs to be honed. Maybe to people, it is laughable or negligible…

Until they realise, wow, I don’t know what to blog about. That is one thing. Content generation does not come out of thin air. If it is a personal blog with no intended audience, fine then. But actually even so, what exactly do you intend to reflect on your day? What is important to you? If you have readership on the other hand, what is important to your audience? Are you restricted to a certain theme or style if you blog for a publication?

Another thing is about how to blog what you want to blog about. Are you coherent? Can people understand you? Do you even want to be understood? How are you going to express your tone just by using words or only pictures? How do you say something without offending people unintentionally? How do you intentionally offend people in a subtle way?

So, conclusion: I would like to get back to writing songs now that I’m quite settled in writing blog posts.

And yes, as an aspiring songwriter, I too would love to write meaningful songs that anyone can relate to.

If even a single word from me can save someone’s life, I would be the happiest person in the world because that would mean I have done my job as a responsible individual.

And Allah is Al-Ghafur, the All-Forgiving. – MM