In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

Just when I have expressed how subpar I felt lately from botching tests…

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There is hope for all of us!

And Allah is Al-Fattaah, the Opener, the Victory Giver. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

I absolutely botched the test set by the Japanese company.

Sighs.

Maybe I’m too dumb for the corporate world…

But le fiancé refused to allow me to believe that of myself. He reminded me that intelligences come in different form and mine was not related to Mathematics.

He cited my writing as an example. My story, Mortal, has made him look forward to reading more.

Well, usually, I would dwell on my failures but for some reason, I’m choosing not to this time or I’m simply disinclined to do so. Maybe financial pressures and other personal worries simply has squashed out any remaining space for self-pity.

Just get over it and get back up on my feet. I have had many rejections in life, especially lately, so I could most likely accept a couple more.

I have been receiving quite a number of offers from childcare. I know, my problem would have been solved easily if I had joined a preschool. But I’ve been so traumatised by the sector that I’ve been very reluctant to take it up again.

They don’t fulfill their ambitions. They simply show off on paper. They are only interested in making money.

Those are the conclusions I have derived from working with my former company.

Hence, that is why I am looking forward to a change in environment. Office work or retail or public service or tourist service.

I have learnt some restraint over the past five years but I am still a passionate person. So when my passion declined at the speed of light at my former workplace, I knew I had to get out of there. Still, even after leaving it, I was still tied to a sense of commitment, enough to tie up remaining loose ends.

Maybe that is why it is quite difficult for me to get a job. The competitiveness is mostly and usually based on paper results. Let’s face it, I am rather dumb in being book smart and rather gullible in being street smart.

The only thing I really have is a lot of heart.

I don’t have a lot but I still give my all.

Okay, I feel pumped enough to get on with life. May life be kinder for everyone reading this. Amin.

And Allah is Ar-Razzaaq, the Ever-Providing. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

Turns out I didn’t have to fly to TTSH later. Le fiancé chose to be discharged as he saw that the hospital was crowded. What a lad.

Doctor’s orders: He is not allowed to fast. Got pills to pop in. Well, thankfully, we are only left with four days of Ramadhan. He will have to make up for his fast. I guess he can do so with me when he is all better in the future before next Ramadhan.

If anything, this incident made me realise that I don’t think I can deal with having him leave me alone in this world. Losing him would definitely bring me unimaginable pain and sorrow.

But at the same time, I am always reminded that I have no control over death by both Him and him. If it happens, I will have to take it in my stride but for as long as possible, I hope I don’t ever have to go through that. Even for my loved ones for that matter.

Gosh. I’m glad his test results came out good.

And Allah is Al-Wahhaab, the Bestower. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

For the first time in my life, I dialled 995 about an hour ago. Le fiancé called me just as I was about to sleep, saying he is struggling to breathe. He tried to see if he could regulate his breathing but in the end he couldn’t and asked me to call for an ambulance. By the third time I called him, he could barely speak. I had to hang up the phone because I gave the emergency operator his contact info since I couldn’t be by his side.

I thank Allah that amidst the panic, I managed to remain calm when calling 995 and I remembered every single detail of him. His age and his home address.

I couldn’t establish contact with him afterwards until about 2am, when I decided to call up Tan Tock Seng Hospital (TTSH), after spending some time trying to figure out which was the nearest hospital to Buangkok Green.

I thank Allah also that I remembered his IC number so the TTSH hotline operator was able to check for me if he had checked into the hospital. Just nice, he just arrived when I made that call.

I wanted to fly over if it was possible but I know I have to keep my cool.

Anyway, he managed to get back to me and told me he is under observation. He told me there is no need for me to go over. I’ll definitely make my way there after pre-dawn meal and morning prayer. Because I am cash strapped, I will have to take public transport.

I really hope we can pay his medical billing using my medisave because he said he doesn’t have any left after draining it for his late mum’s medical expenses. Or else, I can only hope the government has some kindness to top up his account.

I can’t sleep right now although I probably should if I wanna jet over later should he be warded.

Challenge #1: Fasting means I can’t have caffeine during the day to help me stay awake. I think I will have it later during my pre-dawn meal.

Challenge #2: Finance. This might just create even more financial pressure on the both of us.

Challenge #3: I can’t care for him because we are not married yet. Even if I am allowed to go over, I definitely can’t stay overnight.

Just be brave, Nurul Huda. For the brave, nothing is too difficult.

And Allah is Al-Qahhaar, the All-Compelling Subduer. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

The Skype interview went alright. Another 50-50 sentiment. I enjoyed it a lot but I’m not sure how competitive it will be. Anyway, the HR person has informed me that I am to expect another email from them, which will contain details on taking an online test that will last for about two hours, testing my personality, logic, and a few mathematical questions for the fun of it. Oh, wells. Jobs really are so competitive in Singapore that the selection process I have to go through so far are quite exhaustive! Whatever happened to just one interview? Lol. The HR person also informed me that I will have another one to two rounds of interview either via Skype or in person at the Singapore office should I pass that test.

As for the one that I sat for the pre-selection test, if I pass that test, I will have another two preliminary tests.

So yep, like I said, very exhaustive selection processes for the corporate jobs in the communication field.

By the end of tomorrow, I’ll know if I’m selected for a retail associate position at RWS.

Hais.

In any case, I hope everyone has been having a better time than me.

On another note, Pretty Little Liars is coming to an end soon. 😦

It has been absolutely sick TV series. And I mean sick in a good and evil way.

Sighs. They are so pretty. My favourite characters are the three on the right. From the right: Spencer, Emily, Hanna, Aria, and Alison. So yup, I’m a fan of Spencer, Emily, and Hanna. Spencer is intelligent. Emily is bold. Hanna is brave. I relate to them very well. Hehe. Also, watching them has made me inclined to keeping my hair long, a bit more interested in grooming myself, and having a tougher attitude in life.

Oh, how TV shows can change us sometimes.

Oh, and I also have sexy black clothings for next year’s use…when somebody gets lucky. 😉

The official intro:

The full-length song:

Give it a try and see if you can figure out the show’s antagonist. Trust me, it has been quite a ride watching it. The fans have been so amazing in providing their theories but all will be revealed by the finale next week.

And Allah is Al-Ghaffaar, the Ever Forgiving. – MM

In the name of Allah, the All-Compassionate, the All-Merciful.

Righto, I ended my good blogging streak. 😦 But that’s mostly because I’ve been out and about. I think it started with last Saturday, which was the day of the pre-selection test. I feel like I botched it but at the same time, I don’t feel too discouraged by it. Since it was a 50-50 sentiment, I went to apply for more jobs recently. A bookstore, two apparel stores, and the crowd’s favourite state of fun.

Right now, I’m about 8 minutes away to the start of my Skype interview with a Japanese company. Pretty anxious mostly because I don’t know what to expect and as with technology and stuff, things can get wonky.

Here goes nothing.

And Allah is Al-Musawwir, the Fashioner. – MM