In the name of Allah, The Most Beneficent, The Most Merciful.
And so I did not get to wake up at 5am. Despite being in bed by 11-ish, I could not fall asleep until it was after 1am? It was getting close to 2am. Then I woke up at about 3am-ish. I had a little trouble falling back to sleep as well. By the time my 5am alarm rang, I just slept through all the way until it was 7.11am. LOL. Nice timing, right? Like how convenient. Get the pun? 7/11. Convenience mart. Hahahaha!
I did the math and unholy shit, we will have to hustle for at least $200 a day in order to be able to pay for everything. That means each month we will need to rake in $4000.
At this point I am just wondering how we have been able to get by with just my $1900 pay check each month after CPF deductions.
I have to admit, I am extremely afraid but at the same time, I cannot help but feel justified. It goes to show that if Allah wants to help you, your source of income is more than the paycheck you bring home. It is by His providence that we earn through other doors and channels of provisions. In Islam, this is known as rizq. In Malay, it is rezeki. I thought this word to my Chinese friend, Yi Wei, and she has been using it correctly all the time since. Haha!
And yes, actually, the more you give, the more you receive. Never underestimate the power of tipping your Grab/Grabfood drivers, even if it is just $1 each time. Or if you rather, giving the extra change to the Ronald McDonald House Charities. There are loads of venues to give alms. In this modern world, as much as there are lots of venues to sin, there are also just as many ways to do good.
I was looking up the Quran since I cannot pray. Something to set the tone for the day. I am not that random today, so I simply looked up chapter 9 to coincide with today’s date and verse 3 to coincide with the current month of March. And hello, At-Tawbah. Tawbah means repentance. It is something I am moving towards. Or struggling to move towards, actually. Just nice.
A declaration from Allah and His Messenger is made to all people on the day of the greater pilgrimage that Allah and His Messenger are free of the polytheists. So if you pagans repent, it will be better for you. But if you turn away, then know that you will have no escape from Allah. And give good news, O Prophet, to the disbelievers of a painful punishment.
Quran Chapter 9 Verse 3
I find it very interesting that I picked quite a harsh verse at first glance. But as I read deeper into it, I realise it fits my situation perfectly. There is definitely a whole history behind the verse. I cannot quite remember the story. It has been so long since I have had lessons on the history of Islam. I relate to it in terms of the transition I am making in my life right now. From holding down a full-time job to not having one. It is quite a game changer. And in this pursuit of a different sort of life, there is a higher chance of me being likely to be obsessed in chasing money and material wealth to the point where it is almost like I am worshipping a materialistic life. It is a bit of a warning to me; that I should not forget to thank the Creator for creating opportunities for me to earn. As much as we put in the effort to earn, we must be fully aware that we are only able to earn by Allah’s permission.
He can make us sick in an instant and we will not be able to earn. He can grant us great health that our pursuit of having a good livelihood will be made easier. So it is extremely important that I remember, always, first and foremost, who allows me to get what I want and what I need.
And Allah is Al-Wahhaab, The Supreme Bestower. – MM